If you’re also part of the relatively small group of people that watch Summer Olympics, you probably noticed that they started yesterday. I noticed that too, and consequently I have little intention of leaving my house for the next 2 weeks (15 days actually).

As I noted one year ago, NBC anticipates generating 3600 hours of footage, which if recorded (and I think it’s safe to assume NBC is recording it) should last until 2010 olympics, provided you limit your daily olympic intake to 6 hours a day. As for me, I plan to watch it all in the next two weeks (step 1: rent 8 more TVs), then give y’all a heads regarding what to look out for.

With so many world class competitions taking place in parallel, there’s already plenty to blog about. I could, for instance, recount the Chinese weightlifter, and now gold medalist, Chen Xiexia’s (olympic) record-breaking clean-and-jerk, which I just witnessed. I could muse over Przemyslaw Wacha of Poland’s victory over Estonia’s Raul Must in olympic badminton (which I also just witnessed). I could hype up the US women’s sweep in saber fencing (don’t worry, you haven’t missed that one, it’ll be broadcast later today). Or I could just provide a helpful primer on team handball, which is getting a surprising amount of coverage here on day 1 (It’s like soccer, only miniaturized, indoors, and you can use your hands… AWESOME!).

Needless to say, they’ll be time for all that later though (especially that last one). For now, I’m just going to start things off with a clean slate and give a quick rundown of recent events which a more diligent person would have blogged about.

• As I already mention, I went to Canada. Since then I returned home. Toronto was lovely, but people there are absurdly inclined to obey don’t walk signs even when no traffic is coming. Jessica tells me she noticed a lot of that in Munich as well, but that’s neither here nor there.

  Also, in Canada, they spell center “centre”. I’m more of an “er” man myself (get it, because of my name! and my initials!), but I’d be willing to meet them half way and do away with the second “e” all together. Finally, while in Toronto, I had a hell of a meal at Colborne Lane. Our favorite dish was definitely the miso glazed cod, but the ice cream prepared table side via liquid nitrogen was also a highlight.

• I finally got an iPhone. It’s a fine piece of electronics, but buying it was a saga. For some silly reason Jessica and I decided to buy one the saturday after new version came out. The line at Apple’s 14th store didn’t actually seem that long, but since phones had to be activated in store, each Apple employee was basically only selling like 2 or 3 phones an hour.

  We had fun talking to the people standing next to us in line, and Apple did provide water and umbrellas (for the sun), but in the end it took us 4 hours to discover that, SURPRISE, Jessica could only update her pre-Cingular phone plan at an AT&T store. We would have had no problem waiting a week to get the phone, but trust me, if you wait online for something for 4 hours, and then fail to acquire said item, you’ll be emotionally distraught. As much as I love Apple, they did not handle this situation well. Certainly they could have at least given us a free t-shirt or something.
  

• I went to Florida! Jessica’s family is always a blast, but since I gave a comprehensive rundown of last year’s Flordia vacation, and this year’s trip followed a similar trajectory, there’s no need to go into that level of detail. I note, however, that my attempt to follow up last year’s Wii purchase with the acquisition of Wii Fit along was tragically thwarted by it’s lack of availability. Apparently buying it at the Nintendo World Store requires lining up before the store opens, and I’ve had quite enough of that sort of thing.
• On Columbia University’s campus, I saw a dude coax a pigeon onto his foot with some bread crumbs. It was a striking followup to June’s cat-on-hat spotting. I’ll admit, it wasn’t as remarkable as seeing someone walking down the street with a cat on their head, but it was certainly odd. You rarely see folks handling pigeons in NYC, since most folks, it seems, see them as somewhere between diseased squirrel and flying rat on the animal likability scale.

Update: I should have also linked to this slideshow documenting James Fallows trip to the Wolong Panda Reserve.

Instead, you might be better off watching this video of the world’s tallest dog—puppies are available!—meeting the world’s shortest dog. Once again, this title appears unofficial.

Better still, there’s this video of 2007’s world’s ugliest dog. Finally, here’s a photo I like of a cat looking at a deer:

In conclusion, I haven’t put on my shoes all weekend. Coincidence?

Update: On a more substantive note, I also wrote a post once about more intelligent image editing tools (it’s the sort of post a shoe-wearer would write). A few weeks ago the New York Times ran this article that highlights some of the related free software that’s available.

I didn’t have this blog back in December 2006 when the times ran this story, but lead-ins be damned. Last night my housemate brought up the Wikipedia entry for ambergris. As any perfume connoisseur (or futurama fan) knows, ambergris is a waxy substance secreted by sperm whales then oxidized by years at sea. It’s unique and complex smell makes it perfect for top notch perfumes.

Like so much other whaly goodness, the Marine Mammal Protection Act of 1972 banned the sale of ambergris. According to Wikipedia, however, this ruling was overturned in 2001. Collecting floating pieces of whale vomit, after all, doesn’t harm whales (and it keeps our oceans clean!) More importantly, good ambergris can run up to $20 dollars a gram. That’s over $9000 a pound!

So there you have it, time to quit your job and harvest ambergris full time. Unfortunately the only way to presently get ambergris is to search our vast oceans for an ever diminishing supply of whale waste. This is no good for business, but with a modest investment of time and money, I’m confident you can do much better.

Scientists theorize that ambergris is secreted by a sperm whale after it accidently eats some hard to digest item, like the beak of a giant squid. All a young entrepreneur needs to do is raise a bunch of sperm whales, a bunch of giant squids, and once they all grow up, host a few inter-species mixers (possibly sedating the squids first). It’s a can’t miss business, and if you invest in some whale embryos now, you’ll have a fleet of adult sperm whales in about 20 years. Even better, giant squid take only 3 years to grow up (this is important since you’ll be periodically feeding them to the whales).

I realize it’s a bit of a long term investment, so if you’re not convinced, here’s another pre-blog times article highlighting a Puerto Rican farmer who had the foresight to plant mangosteen trees over a decade in advance. Today his trees are finally baring fruit, and as luck would have it Whole Foods currently sells concentrated mangosteen tea at $40 dollars a bottle. I’m hoping the price comes down a bit because the free sample I tried last weekend was excellent. Not too surprising given the mangosteen’s status as a superfruit.

After last month’s ferret post, I’m happy to highlight this article proclaiming the black-footed ferrets triumphant return to the wild. As of 1997 there were only 18 such animals left in their native Wyoming habitat. Fortunately these 18 ferrets were promptly whisked away to zoos, universities, and other ferret lovemaking facilities, and thanks to the support of local ranchers, Wyoming’s black-footed ferret population is back above 200, currently growing at about 35% a year. Hooray for black-footed ferrets! (I also feel obliged to point out that the article’s author is named Megan Fox, so there may be some bias there.)

Call me crazy, but I like watching ferrets more than hair. Maybe it’s my love of animals or the fact that I already see lots of hair on a daily basis. Or just maybe its because ferrets (and indeed most ferret owners) have hair, so when you watch a film about ferrets, you get the hair for free. Also I find hairdressers to be a little less nutty than ferret owners, after all many normal people cut hair.

Personal biases aside, the hairdressers in this film are a cut above most (hilarious!) since they are all members of the US hairdressing team. Where did the US hairdressing team come from? I have no idea. What I do know is that this group of dedicated hair technicians (and their trainers) travelled around the globe in a quest for international glory. In the film, the team competes in the 31st HairWorld Championship in Moscow (think “Olympics of Hair). Unfortunately the team doesn’t do that well, while the Russians, with their home country advantage, win a whole boatload of medals. Fortunately next year’s HairWorld is being held in Chicago, so if you can’t make it to the actual olympics next year, consider HairWorld a questionable alternative.

In fact ferrets are not the only pursuit of excellence being documented by PBS. Film maker Mark Lewis has created three films showcasing the “The Pursuit of Excellence” in unconventional fields. So far I’ve only seen part of the ferret documentary. Still, it was more than enough time to learn that ferrets are playful, and curious creatures, and many of their owners, are, too say the least, colorful. For example, did you know ferrets are a lot like people? You didn’t? Well their owners who dress them and talk to them via sign-language certainly do. Also, did you know that ferrets cross a rainbow bridge when they die, waiting for their owners in heaven? No? Once again ferret enthusiasts are better informed.

I’d write more discoveries, but I have to run out and buy a ferret catch a train. Hopefully my ride will go more smoothly than last time.

Update: I’ve since discovered that the rainbow bridge theory applies to all types pets, not just ferrets. I had a great cat growing up, so it’s good to know he’s every bit as important as some rodent (fun fact: ferrets are not actually rodents).